Check out the below for my top 5 list of celebrities who try way too hard to be sexy. That’s not to say they’re not attractive, as that’s just silly. However, they do pout like fish and strut like they think they’re always on a catwalk. I mean as in on the way to the market or the deli, and they’re swinging their hips and sticking out their newly inflated lips, cos that’s just how they roll. The kind of people who, despite their age, appear to be yet to really grow into their own sexuality.
#5 Paris Hilton - This is a girl who is probably rather pretty in real life. Let’s face it, aside from the comedy hooves, she hit the genetic lottery. Long golden hair and long, slender limbs. She even has that magical wonk and Valtrex encrusted vagina that can snare guys at ten paces. Why is it then, someone who appears to be somewhat naturally blessed in the looks department tries so damn hard to convince people that she is sexy. By sexy, I mean the way a tween means sexy. Very sexual, but with little to no ability to be alluring, charming or seductive.
#4 Aubrey O’Day - This is another girl who didn’t need to do much to be considered run-of-the-mill pretty, right off the bat. However, she has had several surgeries and pumped up her tits and lips. She is proud to be hyper-sexual and you know, I’m not mad at her. However, she does try too hard to be a sex-symbol. There is a difference between being a sexual person and other people thinking you are sexy. Saint Angelina is pretty much the only person of note at the moment, who gets this right.
The remaining three and the winner are under the cut.
#3 Jennifer Lopez - Now, before you bite my head off, yes, La Lopez is perfection. However, look me in the eye and tell me you hadn’t noticed that she is only capable of pulling one face, while on the red carpet. She has one expression. One. The one below. The slightly constipated sucking in of her cheeks, where she is trying to be sultry. Chica has cheekbones, so I don’t know what gremlin told her she needs to suck in her cheeks so damn hard. LaLo, stop trying to be sultry, you already are.
#2 Britney Spears – Britney has done well to keep up the allusion of being a sex kitten for so long. But she isn’t a 17 stick-thin nympho anymore. She’s a slightly tired looking mother of two. Nothing wrong with being a slightly tired looking mother of two, but that and the worn out act of being hyper-sexual 24/7 don’t really mesh for me.
#1 Megan Fox – Not much to say about this other than… F*CKING OBVIOUSLY. No one does lip-licking, cheek sucking in, chest-thrusting and back-arching like this hot tranny mess. I think I finally see why others find her so pretty. Cos, I guess she is. But she tries too hard to hold attention in a sexual way. Who other than a mid-1990′s Angelina and LL Cool J spends that much time licking their lips. Not hot, woman. Not hot.
Image credit to Fame Pictures.
intersting list…got a few other for ya…
the Kardashians (Kourtney more than any of them),
Victoria Beckham (if she went back to her Posh Spice size, she’d be sexy…wouldn’t hurt her to smile once in a while either)
Kelly Ripa- chick is beautiful, but she just tries too hard to be sexy, y’know?
tween stars- do i really need to explain this?
Ashlee and Jessica Simpson- Jessica is the prettier (curvier) and she tries too ahrd at everything…Ashlee is just trying too hard ot keep up with the young folks and be sexy at the same time…she was fine before the nose job, and ever since then she’s gone downhill
No need to explain… also, I can always count on you for amazing additions to these lists. Couldn’t come up with better adds myself!
Jordan definitely belongs here. She’s stooped to some really pathetic lows for attention.
I don’t think BS belongs on the list. She doesn’t try at all! Greasy stained clothes, ratty weave, etc. I guess if she’s appealing to hogs, that’s hot.
I’ll throw in an honorable mention for Jeremy Piven. He really does think he’s the bee’s knees and goes out of his way to make sure others know that.
Jordan is a great addition. She can be vile at times, especially now that she is divorcing. I don’t know much about Jeremy except that he’s greasy. So perhaps he’s a good add too. The BS thing made me lol… she can’t help that she’s a “spiller”. Bwahah.
hmmm, i don’t think Megan tries to be sexy, she just _is_ sexy!
Really, I don’t think so. I’m not the only one annoyed by her. Jezebel called her out for trying too hard too [POST]
[...] Top 5 Celebs Trying Too Hard For Sexy: Guess who? (AG) [...]
I think you have it all wrong. Number one should definately be Heidi Montag/Heidi Pratt/Heidi Montag Pratt/Whoreallycares!
She tries too hard to be ‘sexy’, and fails miserably every single time
Hi and welcome to the site Courtz. Heidi (who seems to have given up in the middle of the transition to a new last name) totally tries too hard. She is a great addition to the list too!