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Posts Tagged ‘Magazine’

Jennifer Aniston Is Not Pregnant With Twins

Aug 25th, 2011
by Amy Grindhouse.
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First things first: NONE of the other magazine covers cared enough to feature Kim Kardsahian’s wedding. There was nothing to stop them from running some generic photo or one of the many aerial shots taken above her wedding. But they didn’t. Not one other major weekly could be bothered to feature her. I guess I was right then. I opined that last week’s lack of interest would continue. None of the weeklies cared then. And, evidently, they don’t care now. The covers went to Jennifer Aniston’s non-existent baby, the Smiths, and Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds’ non-wedding. People were the only ones with a cover and that’s because they were obliged after paying $1.5 million for the exclusive photo rights. Us Weekly and Lies & Style both went for fake stories about Aniston; one says she’s having twins, implying she’s pregnant, the other says lifestyle changes suggest she’s pregnant/ trying. L&S’ cover reads ‘World Exclusive: Fertility Doctor Gives Jen The Good News, It’s Twins… Her bump’s getting bigger.’ The story is based on an anonymous source claiming Aniston wants twins and that she’s seeing a specialist to make it happen using in vitro. Us Weekly follows that lead saying ‘Jen’s Baby Countdown.’ This one’s supposition based on observed changes in lifestyle. The changes? She didn’t drink at a party last weekend, she stopped smoking, she stopped colouring her hair, she wore a baggy shirt, she has been sleeping in until 10 a.m so sources are assuming it’s morning sickness. Ugh.

Jada Pinkett Stole What Can’t Be Stolen… Huh?

Aug 25th, 2011
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Because all women are just husband-stealing whores who won’t quit, let’s start calling Jada Pinkett-Smith a home-wrecker with no proof of a romantic affair between her and Skeletor. It had been alleged by In Touch Weekly that Pinkett-Smith and husband Will Smith were about to separate. Moreover, an alleged affair with HawthoRNe co-star Marc Anthony was blamed. Except watching a DVD would appear to be the extent of the ‘affair.’ ITW’s cover this week is glitter and lies. The magazine alleges that Pinkett-Smith stole away the less-attractive half of Jell-O-tor. Because that’s how whores roll. ‘Jada Steals JLo’s Husband: Will Smith catches Jada and Marc in his own home and runs out crying; Humiliated Will fires his staff for covering it up; Details of their secret separation,’ reads the cover. So much conjecture and glitter. The glitter… IT BURNS! It’s reported by ITW that Will Smith’s suspicions of an affair were ‘painfully confirmed’ when he came to the house unannounced ‘under the cover of darkness.’ Pinkett-Smith and Anthony were supposedly inside… as he was picking up a DVD… and Smith ‘left the house crying’ and he was ‘very upset.’ Supposedly ‘it was as if all hell had broken loose’ the next day and Smith fired a bunch of staff for ‘covering up’ the affair. Pinkett-Smith supposedly moved some of her things out. The couple’s reps deny all of this. Because it’s wise to deny things that never happened. TMZ.com’s sources say the Smiths have severe marriage problems but not because of cheating and they’re not splitting yet.

Sandra Bullock & Ryan Reynolds Aren’t Engaged

Aug 25th, 2011
by Amy Grindhouse.
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I’m going to spend the rest of this week feigning shock at obviously-untrue reports like this. I admit, these tabloids are tricky in their wording with the way they present their titles. However, once you venture inside, the whole thing’s smoke and mirrors. Or blatant lies where they think they can get away with it. This would appear to be one of those times. Above is the cover of this week’s Star. I wish this were some weirdly-Photoshopped monstrosity from an unofficial source but this is the real cover they’re hoping will sell enough to keep the lights on. This. Another wedding that’s not happening. So, I guess Star is alternating the non-wedding of Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux and the non-wedding of Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. Star use the weakest circular logic I’ve ever seen employed to suppose that Reyllock are in love and they should/ may as well get engaged… because he makes her laugh. From HollywoodLife.com ‘A source tells Star that during the two-mile hike around Jenny Lake, Sandra and Ryan talked about spending their lives together.’ Says a source in Star, ‘As the day went on, they started thinking about it, and soon the thought of spending their lives together didn’t sound all that ridiculous… It sounded wonderful… [Later] they enjoyed a few drinks and were very comfortable around each other. They seem to fit together, like it’s a really easy and fun relationship… Ryan is such a sweet-heart, everyone is giving them the stamp of approval. They have a great foundation for a long-term relationship.’ I can’t… oh, there’s more. ‘Ryan hiked the entire Grand Teton National Park trail with Sandra’s adopted son baby Louis on his back. The source says Ryan already feels ‘like a father’ to Louis and he was already talking about buying him a 1968 Mustang or a Harley when he gets older.’ To clarify, Star pulled this out of their a$$es. There’s no engagement or relationship. Gossip Cop went to reps for clarification to be told Star’s story was ‘crap,’ there are no wedding plans and ‘they’ve always been close friends!’

LINKS FROM AROUND THE WEB
 

Anne Hathaway Interviewed By Chelsea Handler

Aug 19th, 2011
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Sometimes I hate the name of this magazine (and a few others, like V and VMAN, for that matter). It’s annoying when the actual interview comes out, because I’m too tired to avoid tripping over repeating words. I’m sloppy and dry at 3 a.m. and I don’t feel like writing anything more articulate than ‘Anne Hathaway interviewed by Chelsea Handler for Interview.’ Think of a real name for your magazine, Interview, or GTFO. Okay, her interview’s below and it’s pretty much random. And it’s long and so I’m going to cherry-pick. She talks about her former love of Jersey Shore, Snooki and JWoww in particular, her Oscars flop, and her potential Catwoman flop. Oh, and she’s having sex with lace in her photo shoot.

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Kelly Preston Gives Scientology Too Much Credit

Aug 18th, 2011
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Kelly Preston has two covers this month for the September issue of Health Magazine, because this magazine needs to exist at all and Preston is totes current. IDK. She always seems like a weird cover model choice for me. What on Earth does she even talk about to get all these interviews? She talks about the same half-dozen things, including her sham marriage and her creaming for $hillentology. And that’s what we get more of in this interview. Posing with her baby son on one cover and posing in the sexiest little red dress Sears has to offer on the other, we learn that Preston credits her religion with her recovery from the grief of losing her son. It wasn’t familial support or her own strength, I guess. It was her seemingly increased involvement with her religion. ‘To be honest, [it was] the Scientology Center,’ Preston tells Health. ‘I don’t know if I would have made it through without it…. Don’t sweat the small things. Love your kids like it could be the last moment.’ Oh, and she did her pregnancy test for baby Benjamin Hunter Kaleo Travolta in secret. Because she and her husband totally had sex. So it wasn’t a complete surprise. Nope. ‘We [were trying] for quite a few years,’ Preston tells Health. ‘When I found out I was pregnant, I was floored. I’d snuck out of bed and then came back and woke Johnny up in bed. We started crying.’

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Anne Hathaway Looks Like Liv Tyler In Interview

Aug 17th, 2011
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Here’s Anne Hathaway doing an impression of Liv Tyler doing an impression of Anne Hathaway. Hathaway’s currently promoting that film for which she butchers an English accent (she gets no points from me, except maybe for trying it, it’s awful). She’s not yet promoting her role as Catwoman in The Dark Knight Rises as that’s still being shot and ruined in broad daylight. I don’t really get this September’s cover; the black and white with the vaguely ‘dripping’ blood red logo. It’s sort of Gothic; like she’s a vampire, trying to shield herself from sunlight with that lace mask. It’s bizarre, right? I don’t hate it, I just think I don’t get it. Below, for giggles, is video of Hathaway rapping on last night’s Conan.

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