Kim Kardashianlanded the cover of Cosmopolitan UK May 2012. The serial urinal cake explains why she’s slept around and been married twice. By her own account, it’s because her soul needs different NBA/ NFL penises at different points in her life. She tells the magazine: ‘I just don’t believe in one soul mate now… I think you have different soul mates throughout your life, that your soul needs different things at different times.’ The rest of her interview is below.
Not in a way that would interest Vivid Entertainment, but a tacky tabloid smearing of something other than urinal cake residue. Giving this a cursory glance because it’s amusing the lengths to which they’re going to calumniate one another, Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are both venting using tabloid mouthpieces while pretending to be above it. Kardashian is using Us Weekly, whom she covers this week, to say Humphries is extorting and humiliating her. Assuming this comes from Kardashian herself, a ‘source’ says: ‘He’s doing anything he can to get her attention. She would grant a divorce in a second. But he won’t sign the papers. He won’t let go… Kris wants money and he wants fame. Kim doesn’t care if she never sees another camera again. She is just a totally different person.’ Humphries ran to RadarOnline.com, where a ‘source’ said: ‘Kris thinks it’s somewhat ironic that Kim doesn’t want cameras in the courtroom for the proceedings. What is Kim so afraid of? If Kim would stop engaging in such childish and selfish behavior she would be a much happier person and Kris is relieved that the marriage ended and she is out of his life, he has moved on.’
Still legally-married because MONIES, here’s an interim update on the divorce of Kim Kardashian from Kris Humphries to balance some of the annoying smearing that’s been going on. Pro-Kardashian mouthpieces like Us Weekly, who went on the couple’s honeymoon to take photos and got the exclusive for Kourtney’s preggo reveal, are claiming Kardashian’s life is ‘hell’ during this divorce. Probably because she’s somewhat limited in the ways she can play it for money/ publicity/ attention. And most pro-Kardashian outlets have been smearing Humphries since the previews of Kourtney & Kim Take New York, claiming that Humphries is a slow opportunist which is mean because they’re only half right.
Humphries makes $8 million a year in the NBA but her pimps at E! and mouthpieces like TMZ claim Humphries is basically playing hardball and trying to extort money by waiting his estranged wife out until she’s desperate enough to pay the reported $7 million settlement that supposedly includes a gag-clause. He had his lawyer talk to Lies&Style. And now, it seems, more-sympathetic RadarOnline.com is countering the smearing with a story about how Humphries is probably done with any negotiaiton because it wouldn’t be worth ruining his name in the tabloids: ‘Kris is furious about reports that he is making Kim’s life hell…. he won’t be bullied by her anymore. Kris has told his lawyer to no longer attempt to reach a settlement with Kim… he is ready to take this to trial, and he will. A judge can decide if the marriage should be annulled on grounds of fraud. Kris’ name has been trashed in the press by Kim’s camp… and he has the right to fight back, but he isn’t doing it the way she is. He will have his day in court.’
In semi-related news, someone made Wook wear a tarp for this new Kardashian ad where surprisingly some of the only Photoshop is Kourtney’s baby bump.
In news that will surprise no one, the Kardashians know the sister of the flour-bomber. Last week, FUR HAG!’s event was interrupted by a de-lousing courtesy of animal activist Christina Cho of whom PETA denied all knowledge or ties. However, Cho had pulled similar stunts for PETA before and won an award from the charity for her activism in 2010. Moreover, Cho’s younger sister Michelle Cho is a PETA spokesperson/ manager out of the Los Angeles office who met Kim and Khloe Kardashian in 2008 for PETA-centric season 3, episode 3 of Keeping Up With The Kardashians entitled I’d Rather Go Naked… Or Shopping. The pimps at E! posted this on their site so I may as well post the videos too, below because they auto-play. Michelle Cho is introduced as ‘Michelle: PETA Manager.’ THANKS Lynne, for pointing this out, as soon as you mentioned it I was like ‘OH, HER!’
Khloe Kardashian quit PETA, following the revelation that the charity is tangentially-related to last week’s flour-bombing. At the time, PETA denied flouring the ‘FUR HAG!’ although they showed full support for the staged-looking attack: ‘It was not [us]. We were given the video by an anti-fur activist on the scene.’ However, the attacker’s identity has been revealed as Christina Cho, a PETA activist who has staged many similar anti-fur stunts including grabbing a mic from Donna Karan in 2010 to protest the use of fur in fashion. Cho won an award from PETA in 2010. Cho is also the younger sister of a senior Los Angeles-based PETA executive. That’s enough for Kardashian, 27, to quit supporting the charity with a ‘No more titties for you!’ blog: ‘Not only has PETA lied to the public, but they have proved that they support this kind of behavior. I’ve been a vocal supporter of PETA for a long time but I have also been very vocal about anti-bullying, so this was a huge disappointment for me… We all need to practice what we preach. I will continue to not wear fur, but I no longer support PETA.’
Following a laboured stunt, during which a random woman walked past press and security and had time to empty a bag of flour over Kim Kardashian’s head, the 31-year-old has changed her mind and decided to press charges against the attacker. Initially, people blamed PETA for the stunt since the as-yet unnamed woman called Kardashian ‘FUR HAG!’ rather than ‘PEE WHORE!’ Except PETA were all ‘LOL, NOPE. It wasn’t us, but we’re glad she was floured.’ After phoning in to TMZ Live to discuss the stunt and further shill the perfume launch that already got a bunch of free publicity, telling the hosts that she planned to let it go because there was no time on the day to address the incident, Kardashian immediately ran to her pimps at E! to say the opposite: ‘I said earlier no I wasn’t [going to file a complaint]. I am just going to think about it, because I don’t want someone to think they can really get away with that. So we are going to handle that.’ Except PETA is chiming in again calling the charges selfish: ‘If she presses charges, at least people will be constantly reminded of her selfish, callous disregard for the cruel deaths that she causes by wearing fur. How much better it would be if she decided to evolve and enhance her image by donating her vulgar furs and exotic-animal skins to the homeless. The activist acted from the heart, something Kim doesn’t seem to have. If anything, Kim should get a life, the very thing that she denies animals.’ Photos of Kardashian are from the weekend.
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