This is the photo shoot during which Jennifer Lopez was accompanied by the help, Vogue April 2012. It’s a Mario Testino cover on which she appears to be wearing Bottega Veneta Spring 2012. Testino also just shot Lopez for her V Magazine cover. This cover causes my eyes to gloss over, IDK why. Maybe because her side-boob, bicep, and profile aren’t that captivating. It’s pretty, but forgettable and dull. It would have been better in almost any other pose.
Wearing a sports cup in which she’s stashing her diamonds, here’s Jennifer Lopez on the misguided cover of the V Magazine Sports Issue shot by Mario Testino. She has a penis on this cover, yes? Like, there’s a strap on under there as well as the diamonds. It’s probably supposed to show a Madonna-esque masculine energy, yet Lopez relies on under-boob the rest of the shoot. The interview and photo shoot are below. I can’t even. Asked ‘LOL WUT?’ about the choice of a men’s cup rather than women’s one for the cover, to go with the slicked hair after Testino trashed her idea for big curls, she says she preferred the men’s because ‘I thought it was more graphic… It did make me feel tougher.’
I think Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart are becoming a thing. As in, he’s clawed his way up from bottom b**ch, to driver, to lover, to King of The Help. He’s, like, at the top of the help pile. And the tabloids are reveling in Lopez slumming because it’s base to fraternize with the help. Speaking of which, there are rumours that they’re adopting. And Lies & Style has a spirited story this week about how Smart proposed to Lopez and she moved him into her house and integrated him into her life after only three-months together. She’s that pressed for d**k, she’s living with the help. Like, in a way that would actually necessitate eye-contact. I don’t know how I feel about that. Anyway, this is how Lopez spent Valentine’s Day, also on Twitter. The 42-year-old shared this photo of herself and a guy who’s almost certainly not her bio son, so it’s okay, with the caption: ‘HAPPY VALENTINES DAY #JLOVE?RS!! I wish U ALL lots of love today and always! I l appreciate and love you all. #sweettweet.’ She tried to delete the photo and the Valentine’s tweet after, not realising the Internet CTRL+C’d it already.
Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart are still in New York City. Honestly, the help is just Monday’s piece who lasted until Tuesday. Well, played. But, honestly, he’s obviously nothing special. The level of slumming required to keep him around this long should be proof of that. Not satisfied just dragging the help around Miami for a Vogue shoot, and New York City for a Letterman taping, Lopez will probably bring her man-child to her Oscars hosting gig. Oh, that. For some reason Lopez has been chosen as a presenter at the February 26 Academy Awards, leading to speculation she’ll be slumming with the help on the red carpet there too (Celebitchy points out, Lopez has a history of this starting with ex-help/ dancer/ husband, Chris Judd with whom she attended the 2001 Oscars.).
Jennifer Lopez and the help, who didn’t win a SAG Award this weekend, to clarify, are still sleeping together. WHEE! Honestly, I’m assuming. Mostly, I’m assuming the help must be earning his keep because he is living Lopez’s life and slumming with her. Except, to him, it’s not slumming. For example, Lopez and her man-child were in Miami Beach last week for what was rumoured to be a Vogue shoot. The help. At a Vogue shoot. Really? Lol, sure. And he’s always leading her around as though he knows where the heck he’s going. Isn’t that like a toddler leading you by the hand while you’re walking around with them? Like: ‘Can we not? You JUST had a Happy Meal!’ Photos around NYC and at Letterman.
Because three divorces isn’t enough to write herself off as a failure, Jennifer Lopez may marry again. Not specifically asked about her relationship with the help, Lopez told the Today Show: ‘I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. We’ll see. I mean, I don’t know. It’s not time to think about that yet. It’s still fresh.’ Asked why she’s still making nice with Marc Anthony, Lopez said ‘because that’s how grown folks with chirren divorce’: ‘There is real love there… Marc and I were friends before we got married. We were friends for years, and we always loved each other. And, obviously, we have children together, so it’s not going to be like he’s not in my life. He’s always going to be in my life.’ 15 photos of Lopez dressed like it’s still 1999, in white fur, at the Today Show this morning.
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