Because she’s great at making decisions that don’t involve keylogging Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston is probably going to mess up the relationship with her cats’ stepfather, Justin Theroux. According to the kinds of sources who will only go through paper recycling, not actual trash, Aniston is planning to marry without a prenup. Source tell OK! Magazine how Aniston’s next divorce is going to go down, ’Jen’s absolutely adamant about not having a prenup.’ She’s reportedly telling her cats, ‘I’m choosing love, not money. And people are just going to have to deal with it.’ The source continues, ‘It’s a sweet and romantic thing to do. But a number of friends are desperately worried her decision could come back to haunt her one day.’
Posts Tagged ‘Celebrity Wedding’
Apparently, this engagement was reported last month while I was (successfully) drinking until it stopped hurting. Because this is news to me. RadarOnline.com is incredulous at being overlooked as the original source of the news a month ago, as People.com claims the ‘exclusive confirmation’ this weekend that Olivia Wilde is engaged to Jason Sudeikis. RadarOnline reports its sources know the couple has been ‘secretly engaged [since December] and had already booked a wedding venue in the Saturday Night Live funnyman’s hometown of Kansas City.’ People Magazine’s sources add: ‘They are so excited. And very, very happy.’ A spokesperson for Wilde confirms to Us Weekly. A source for Us Weekly confirms the couple got engaged mid-December, adding: ‘He finally found the one that made him want to commit. They’ve both been through it before and this has just felt right from the get go. Everyone is happy for them.’ And Wilde herself confirms on Twitter, writing: ‘Thanks for all the sweet congratulatory love, friends! And may I compliment your savvy use of that nifty engagement ring emoticon.’
At some point in 2011 when Playboy’s sales began to dip, Hugh Hefner decided it would be a great idea to contrive a runaway bride plot for a reality show and magazine cover because his business model relies on people actually paying for pornography. And at some point in 2012, he finally got his bottom b**ch down the aisle. Not that anyone was paying attention because everyone had the day off and those who didn’t were too busy covering the ejaculate Kanye West accidentally left inside Kim Kardashian three months ago. But they’re married. Hefner shared this photo of their wedding with the caption: ‘Crystal & I married on New Year’s Eve in the Mansion with Keith as my Best Man. Love that girl!’
- KHLOE K LOSING TOO MUCH WEIGHT? - Fishwrapper
- Jennifer Aniston Needs To Wear Bras - Lainey Gossip
- Eva Longoria Accidentally Flashed Her Goods - TooFab
- Jennifer Aniston Strips: Shocking Video - Fishwrapper
- Miley Cyrus Is Posing Almost Naked - Hollywood PQ
- KIM K CRYING OVER PREGNANCY!!! - TooFab
- Truth About Cheating Kristen Stewart - Lainey Gossip
- Amanda Bynes: Where Did It Go Wrong? - TooFab
Kate Winslet married that guy with a stupid name because her body hasn’t quit on her yet nor has love. Winslet married Ned Rock’nRoll earlier this month and is only confirming today because everyone’s too drunk to care right now; it’s the less-annoying version of burying news on a Friday, except you’re burying news when the whole country is still drinking until it stops hurting. Winslet’s rep said in a statement: ‘I can confirm that Kate Winslet married Ned Rock’nRoll in NY earlier this month in a private ceremony attended by her two children and a very few friends and family. The couple had been engaged since the summer.’
A bunch of people waited until the world slipped into its yearly holiday stupor before getting engaged to make sure the least amount of people possible were paying attention. This weekend, for example, Deadmau5 proposed to Kat Von D on Twitter since she already lives her whole life including relationships on social media (she’s announced engagements on Twitter before, for example). Apparently proposing with a .JPG because the actual ring wasn’t ready in time, and because he couldn’t wait any longer, Deadmau5 wrote ‘I can’t wait for Christmas so … Katherine Von Drachenberg, will you marry me? (Changing the diamond to a black diamond FYI… sorry for the JPG. They’ll finish the actual ring soon, I hope. I love you.’ To which she replied ‘YES,’ presumably while sitting next to him, and instead of having a conversation with her, he replied back ‘Holy f**king s**t, I’m engaged and stuff.’ She added: ‘Please excuse me while I go squeeze the hell out of my fiancé!’ This follows them breaking up on Twitter November 9, when Kat Von D wrote: ‘Deadmau5 and I are no longer together.’ In other news, Kelly Clarkson is engaged to Brandon Blackstock. Janice Dickinson is engaged to Dr. Robert Gerner. And Jessica Simpson’s former assistant Cacee Cobb married former Scrubs actor Donald Fiason at Zach Braff’s house.
People Magazine released their idiotic wedding issue, with Justin Timberlake’s heel at his wife’s eye-level, replete with anecdotes about how he pulled focus from the bride walking down the aisle too because everyone was busy crying at the song he wrote for the occasion. And aside from it looking like a reject NSYNC album on which Jessica Biel is an afterthought, everyone is talking about Britney Spears appearing on the cover a decade after they split. Which obviously isn’t an accident. But I just thought People were gifting us with an early Christmas handjob because that cover is like all my Christmases coming at once. Except, not so much, it’s more like spite. The photos of Justin Timberlake at Justin Timberlake’s wedding, featuring Justin Timberlake as wedding singer with fashions designed by Justin Timberlake, were few, grainy, and poorly-lit, which angered the magazine who paid $300,000 for the rights to be left with a paltry selection. So they chose the worst of the bad bunch for the cover and stuck the knife in by adding Spears. Hello! Magazine bought the rights in the UK and I guess they’re p**sed too although they left his ex-girlfriend off the cover.
Word around magazine circles is that PEOPLE was not happy with the quality of the pictures that JT sent over. Rumour has it the lighting was s**t, they had little to work with, and, considering what they paid, they were disappointed with what they were sent… which is typical Justin Timberlake, isn’t it? You will take what you get. You will be happy with what I give you. Because I’m Justin Timberlake. You should just be grateful I picked you. Well, perhaps not as grateful as he expected. Because PEOPLE (PEOPLE! of all people! can you imagine what an intolerable d**k he must be if PEOPLE decided to f**k him over in return?) made sure that he shared his special day with Britney. [via Lainey Gossip]