
My near name-sake, Amy Winehouse, is the latest celebrity on the Lord Xenu’s hit-list [Website – Amy Grindhouse].
According to reports in today, my sexier doppelganger and her little-girl-lost ways, have garnered the attention of the sexi Martians at the Church of Scientology.
Now, before I even bother writing this post, I would just like to say that I have nothing against the Church of Scientology… Nope, not me… Nada!
How could I?
After all, they are all such hot biatches. Show me another church that is bursting at the seams with so many fiiine pieces of arse. Man, keepin’ it real, if regular churches were like that, I might actually go!
*Looks around the room to check if she has upset one of the sexi Scientology Martians… seems not…. takes off her foil cap and resumes blogging…*
Yeah, like I was saying, what a load of f*ckery!
The Wino a.k.a. Crackie McBeehive, allegedly received a call from the Scientology Center in Los Angeles.
At least that is what she thought… F*ck knows that when I call someone who is in the same city as me, from a spot in my house that has a sh*tty weak signal, they sound like they are on another planet. Sh*t knows how the Scientolo-dudes sounded calling Wino’s Camden crack-hovel, all the way from L.A.!
According to the Mirror:
Amy has told mates she received a “welcoming” phone call from the religious sect’s “celebrity centre” in LA.
“They told her they wanted to help her beat drugs and could tailor-make a programme so she wouldn’t have to go to a residential centre. She liked that idea because her husband Blake is out of prison soon and wouldn’t want to be away from him when he’s finally freed.”
I already signed up for this course. Sounded like a hoot, drugs or no drugs. That is why my caustic-witted writing style went down the sh*tter late last week. I was in my special classes, where I was too busy being a hot biatch to bother paying any attention to my blog. If it weren’t for you, my fiyahhh commenters, dude, I would have abandoned writing altogether and become a ‘celebrity-gossip auditor’ at the Scientolo-Center!
[IMAGE CREDIT: Pacific Coast News]
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