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I Guess You Can Sleep Your Way To The Middle, But It’s Harder To Stay There

Khloe Kardashian X Factor Finale Week

The Kardashians got to where they are by riding the coat tails of the one who slept her way to the middle. It’s axiomatically possible to have a career that way but I guess it’s harder to keep it, because one of them has just been fired from something (which surely means 10 lashes at the whorehouse). In a series of official statements today, Simon Cowell and FOX admitted to firing Khloe Kardashian who proved unpopular with audiences and actually appeared to hurt ratings. ’I’m thrilled Mario is back for Season Three of The X Factor,’ said Simon Cowell who invited back only one of the co-hosts. ‘Hosting a live show and keeping the judges – especially Demi – in line, is not an easy job, but Mario is a pro and we are glad he’s coming back.’ FOX confirmed in its own statement, ‘Khloe Kardashian will not be returning to co-host The X Factor. We really enjoyed working with her and wish her all the best in her future endeavors.’

I Guess That Makes Reese Witherspoon A Hypocrite As Well As An A**hole

Reese Witherspoon MTV Movie Awards 2011

I slept through one whole Internet this weekend, maybe two, because I woke up in a world where Reese Witherspoon is a belligerent drunk who is permissive of her husband’s drink-driving. But it turns out she’s a hypocrite as well as an a**hole. Do you remember that speech she gave at the 2011 MTV Movie Awards about how she’s better than the other female winners because she didn’t get to where she is in her career by being the ‘bad girl’? It’s still technically true, of course, but this is as hilarious as Kristen Stewart pining for more drama in her life before being caught banging someone else’s husband.

‘I get it, girls, that it’s cool to be a bad girl,’ said the actress, referring to Blake Lively leaking nudes for attention. ‘But it is possible to make it in Hollywood without doing a reality show. When I came up in this business, if you made a sex tape, you were embarrassed and you hid it under your bed…. So, for all the girls out there, it’s totally possible to be a good girl. I’m going to try to make it cool.’

Kanye West Remembered He Got Kim Kardashian Pregnant

Kim Kardashian, Kanye West Go Shopping in NYC

I guess Siri being the most responsible person in your relationship means that you squeeze your baby mother in between demos, because here are Kim Kardashian and Kanye West after a calendar entry reminded them about date night. After using TMZ.com to convince people he’s a good soon-to-be-parent rather than putting the hours in as his girlfriend talks about her painful, difficult pregnancy and protracted divorce, both of which she dealt with alone, West put in a photo op because that’s obviously the same as being a good boyfriend.

16 photos below of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West in New York yesterday.

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Bethenny Frankel Shows Off Her Bikini Body In Miami

LinksPicture

  • Bethenny Frankel wearing a bikini to distract from her divorce [Reality Tea]
  • Amber Rose gets a tattoo of Wiz Khalifa’s face on her arm [Starcasm]
  • Eva Longoria’s reality show Ready for Love already cancelled [Evil Beet]
  • Kate Hudson shocks Sarah Jessica Parker and Gwyneth Paltrow [Bohomoth]
  • Adrianne Curry posing with a vibe but without clothes on Twitter [SOMG]
  • There should pretty much be a live stream on Ryan Lochte [The Superficial]
  • Harper Seven Beckham’s mom & Harper Seven Beckham [I'm Not Obsessed]
  • Justin Bieber’s relationship with Selena Gomez is back on [Star Crush]

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Miley Cyrus Has Great Gams, Still Isn’t A Fan of Underwear

Miley Cyrus Short Short Sheer Shirt Photo 1

Because Fat Betty is on television on Sundays, Miley Cyrus is pulling focus by wearing a sheer shirt with no bra and shorts so short her butt crease is showing. Another photo below of her shopping in Sherman Oaks without her engagement ring.

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Amanda Bynes Is Going To Sue The Internet In 140 Characters or Less

Amanda Bynes Twitter Photo April 22 2013

Amanda Bynes has taken a break from re-tweeting every cloying sycophant who pays her a compliment, and has returned to threatening to sue the Internet for checking her Twitter feed. Over a series of messages this weekend, Bynes defended the action of walking around with a scarf over her face ‘What up @nydailynews? I’m being stalked by paparazzi outside my apartment, so I block myself from them. I know your paper is run by a bunch of old folks but maybe stop writing the same retarded thing about me.’ Later, dictionary in hand, she went on a rant about suing Us Weekly for doing its job. She actually wrote this…

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