Now that I have your attention (lols), I just want to let you know in advance that if you have clicked, looking for muchas, muchas VMA info, sorry but you have come to the wrong place. Some asshole stole all my money, so I am too poor to afford cable.
OK, I admit it, I am not really (that) poor, just too much of a lazy arsehole to bother setting up Sky. Such a bloody arse ache to get that shit set up and not really worth all the bother.
Anyhoo, for that reason and because the only way for me to watch the whole thing, is to do so on YouTube (and I’ll be fucked if I’m gonna bother doing that) I have no real idea what happened at the VMA’s.
There are some good highlights, which I heard about. I will share those in a minute (SOD YOU… I’ll post them in my own good time… you’re not the boss of me!)
Here is what I do know:
- My beloved Cheeto Spears won Cheeto of the Year 2008 or some shit, for her song/ video ‘Piece of Me’.
- Lil Wayne made a menace of himself and his trews nearly fell down.
- Jordin Sparks made an arse of herself.
- Might-Cut-A-Bitch Knowles turned up looking like a Christmas decoration.
- Xtina made a valient effort to dress like one of the Hot-Tranny-Mess Dolls.
- Yada, yada, yada…
If you want the real scoop on what happened at the VMA’s, head over to the unforgivably funny DListed, where the writer did the funniest live blog that I have ever seen:
8:57pm – FIRST!!! I’ve always wanted to say that.
9:00pm – HOLY FUCK! Cheetos just fell out of my ass! It’s BRIT BRIT!!!
9:00pm – That weave is crying for help.
9:01pm – Brit Brit is an amazing atress. Everyone, feast your eyes on the next Meryl Streep. Seriously, I can’t believe she memorized these lines. And that WEAVE! Woe is THAT WEAVE!
9:02pm – I have a feeling this is going to be very anti-climactic.
9:03pm – That audience is filled with like 10 people. That place is fucking tiny! Imagine what it smells like. Actually, don’t. I need you to be awake during this.