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Suri’s Alien Papa Speaks

With all the money Tom Cruise has, you would think that he could afford to buy a clue [Website – Amy Grindhouse].

Cruise has given an insight into his admirable attempts at raising his button-nosed daughter, Suri, to be a spoiled brat. He insists that the little-one refuses point-blank to wear pants and is a ‘girly girl’. WTF does that even mean, when you are talking about a two-year-old?

Cruise insists that Suri is “girlie girl. She won’t wear pants.” He goes on to say, “Kate finally got her in jeans the other day. We put the pants on and walk away and the pants are off and the dress is on.”

First of all, is he STILL trying to convince people that in order to be welcomed into Xenu’s arms in the after-life, they have to call Alien Queen Katie, ‘Kate‘. Give it up biatch! That shit went out with the arc. You’ll have about as much success with that, as I do, trying to persuade people to call Robert Pattison ‘Greasy-Greasy Spot-Spot’.

Second, who is he trying to kid? Suri is two-years-old and is too busy getting her nails done, to bother putting on pants! The same group of Three Magical Pixies (MP3) that make sure Britney puts on underwear in the morning, complete their Community Service by putting pants on Suri.

[IMAGE CREDIT: Jackson Lee / Tom Meinelt]

AmyGrindhouse.com written by Amy Grindhouse © All rights reserved. When quoting, use excerpts with attribution only. Images, branding and original content should not be reproduced without prior permission.

Britney Spears ‘Circus’ Full HQ Audio Release… HOORAH!

Wanna hear the new Britney Spears album ‘Circus’, for FREE and legally? No?!?! Well screw you, CLICK below to listen anyways. You never know, you might like it! [Website – Amy Grindhouse]

Music To Eat Cheetos by has been released to listen to via imeem, and I just want to say thanks to them, on behalf of all the Cheeto munching Brit Brit fangirls out there.

I must admit, I actually heard the album on YouTube over the weekend, but it is nice to be able to hear an official HQ version.

Now, I can concentrate on playing my Cheeto eating game (where I stuff 10 cheesy treats into my mouth at a time, whenever Britney elongates a vowel sound) without the annoying distraction of grain YouPoop LQ audio. 

CLICK TO LISTEN – BRITNEY SPEARS HQ MP3 ‘CIRCUS’ AUDIO

AmyGrindhouse.com written by Amy Grindhouse © All rights reserved. When quoting, use excerpts with attribution only. Images, branding and original content should not be reproduced without prior permission.

Celeb Snax 25/11/08: Robert Pattison’s Award Winning Hair… & More

Check out the below, for some mighty filling celeb snax [Website – Amy Grindhouse].

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AmyGrindhouse.com written by Amy Grindhouse © All rights reserved. When quoting, use excerpts with attribution only. Images, branding and original content should not be reproduced without prior permission.

 

Has Hell Frozen Over?

I’ll just spit it out, before I vomit Cheetos all over my keyboard, Miley Cyrus is apparently being positioned to score an Academy Award (Oscar) nomination, for the song she “co-wrote” and performed for the Disney movie, ‘Bolt’ [Website – Amy Grindhouse].

Stab me in the eye with stale cheese doodlez and shove heroin laced cotton-candy in my ears, plehz. Slutty Cyrus, prosti-tot extraordinaire, has about as much musical talent as my morning bowel movement, so how in the phuck did she even get on the radar of the Oscar panel?!?

According to MTV News:

For the song “I Thought I Lost You,” which Cyrus wrote with Jeffrey Steele and performs with John Travolta in the movie “Bolt,” the 15-year-old “Hannah Montana” star is listed as a presumptive favorite in the category of Best Original Song by several Oscar handicappers, most notably The Los Angeles Times.

She’s a truly cross-platform sensation — a TV star, platinum recording artist and a burgeoning big-screen playmaker — but you’ll never guess what Miley Cyrus is potentially poised to do next: win an Academy Award?

It [doesn't]  surprise executive producer John Lasseter in the least. 

“[The song] so sums up the theme of this film. You know, a dog and its owner and they both were separated, but they love each other so much — there’s such an emotional payoff when these characters get reunited, and I think that’s what this song’s about,” he said. “When [Miley and John] sang it, it just really, really works. I mean, it’s a great song unto itself, but it really works in the movie.”

DOES MILEY CYRUS DESERVE AN OSCAR NOD? 

[IMAGE CREDIT: Russ Einhorn / Splash News*]

*Yes I chose a deliberately bent looking picture of her O_o

AmyGrindhouse.com written by Amy Grindhouse © All rights reserved. When quoting, use excerpts with attribution only. Images, branding and original content should not be reproduced without prior permission.

Kanye Explains His CAPS BLOGS

Kanye West has finally explained his total BS motives behind writing in all CAPS in his angry, shouty CAPS BLOGS.

The perpetually agitated rapper explains thusly:

I USE ALL CAPS CAUSE I’M LAZY NOT MAD. I TYPE WITH ONE HAND AND HOLD THE PHONE WITH THE OTHER.

Um, sweetums, can you not write in all small letters and type with one hand? Or, why not scream for your assistant, every time you need someone to hold down the shift key. Methinks that you could do either, or just mash the keypad with your forehead and be done with it. Either way, you have both hands free to hold your peen “phone”.

IMAGE CREDIT: Curtis Leigh / Splash News

Twilight Didn’t Die A Death At The Box Office!?!

GASP – the film that has seen tweenagers throughout the nation start wetting the bed again, in unbearable anticipation, ‘Twilight’, has opened at number 1 in the U.S. [Website – Amy Grindhouse].

The film, starring two (or more) people that I am hard-pushed to care about, took $70 million during its debut, according to Friday’s estimates.

As with all successful franchises a money sucking sequel is already in the works. WOOT! Another limp film with greasy actors. Someone remind me to wrap myself in greaseproof paper, if I ever decide to go and watch this film. I feel like I would come out of the cinema covered in Robert Pattinson’s oily hair products and slide right the phuck off my seat, if I don’t protect myself.

Good to know that all the people who are (also) hard pushed to pay their bills can still afford overpriced movie tickets and snacks. Way to prioritize*!

* I KEED, I KEED!

AmyGrindhouse.com written by Amy Grindhouse © All rights reserved. When quoting, use excerpts with attribution only. Images, branding and original content should not be reproduced without prior permission.