It’s Okay, Megan Fox Was Lying About That Whole No Longer Being Overly Sexual Thing

Right after a baby thing fell out of the hole next to the hole she poops from, Megan Fox said this about having a sexual image as a new mother: ‘[Motherhood] changes your perspective about being overly sexual in a film when you have a baby. I’m going to be more cautious about choosing films because I’m already thinking about when he’s in school and his friends are going to be showing him my photo shoots with me in a bikini and he’s going to be horrified.’ Except, you’ll be glad to know, that was a complete lie because here she is around the same time postpartum with her plastic face and bra and panties on the cover of Esquire Magazine. The interview’s below that completely excludes the bats**t insane stuff I can’t even… I’m too tired for that s**t.

On why she’s getting her Marilyn Monroe tattoo removed: ‘I feel like I willed it be gone. They told me it was going to take six sessions and it’s nearly gone in one. I started reading about her and realized that her life was incredibly difficult. It’s like when you visualize something for your future. I didn’t want to visualize something so negative. [Marilyn Monroe] wasn’t powerful at the time. She was sort of like Lindsay [Lohan]. She was an actress who wasn’t reliable, who almost wasn’t insurable…. She had all the potential in the world, and it was squandered. I’m not interested in following in those footsteps.’
On her new idol: ‘Ava Gardner. She had power. She was a broad. She got what she wanted and said what she needed.’
On the indignities of fame: ‘I don’t think people understand. They all think we should shut the f***k up and stop complaining because you live in a big house or you drive a Bentley. What people don’t realize is that fame, whatever your worst experience in high school, when you were being bullied by those ten kids in high school, fame is that, but on a global scale, where you’re being bullied by millions of people constantly.’
On the indignities of her sexual image when her tits are out on the cover of a magazine: ‘I felt powerless in that image. I didn’t feel powerful. It ate every other part of my personality, not for me but for how people saw me, because there was nothing else to see or know. That devalued me. Because I wasn’t anything. I was an image. I was a picture. I was a pose.’