At the time People Magazine published Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel’s idiotic wedding cover on which he ‘cockbloked his own wedding photos’ by ensuring his heel was at his wife’s eye-level, I joked that the only reason he got married at all is because he couldn’t get away with marrying himself. But he would have if he could have. Only to find that every single person who looked at the cover made the same observation because Timberlake’s such an insufferable cretin it’s barely hyperbole to say he’d do anything to pull focus from his wife and wedding day because it’s a People cover and it’s got to be all about him. And as it turns out, Timberlake’s friends are just like he is. Or worse. Depending on how you interpret this story. On Tuesday, Lainey Gossip posted a blind item that’s already come true about friends of a celebrity whose gift to the couple was an 8.5 minute video mocking the homeless people of Los Angeles. Timberlake’s real estate friend Justin Huchel (of course Justin has a friend called Justin) made and played a video without warning him first. Featuring homeless, drug addicts, and other barely-lucid people who could barely feed and clothe themselves, saying they’re friends and they’re SO sorry that they can’t make it to the wedding. Because it’s hilarious that poor people can’t afford intercontinental travel to attend a $6.5 million wedding for which the couple were paid $300,000 just for smiling at the camera. Timberlake’s friends are just like Timberlake. A**holes.
Included below are scans of the couple’s wedding photos from the magazine.