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Jessica Alba Preparing For The Bikini Inspector

Or that could be her unqualified husband and not the bikini inspector at all. I DEMAND TO SEE I.D.! Here’s Jessica Alba in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico January 2, after spending her whole New Year’s on the beach with her family. She’s wearing a pink bikini today; hot pink, which is rather more eye-catching than the muted bikini from last week. Well here is Alba, five-months postpartum, because ribs are still for fatties, one-piece suits are still for fatties, and fat is still for fatties.

P.S. I’m tickled that it escapes some people how this post, and the whole site, is sardonic.

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