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Posts under ‘Picture Galleries’

Kim Kardashian Says Jon Hamm Is ‘Careless’

Forgetting that she’s famous for turning a gallon of urine to the face into urinal cakes for the whole family, Kim Kardashian has responded to technically-correct comments from Jon Hamm in which he criticised Kardashian and vapid celebrities of her ilk. In an interview published in Elle UK, Hamm said: ‘Whether it’s Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian or whoever, stupidity is certainly celebrated. Being a f**king idiot is a valuable commodity in this culture because you’re rewarded significantly. Incuriousness has become cool… It’s celebrated. It doesn’t make sense to me.’ Kardashian gargled, spat, and replied: ‘I just heard about the comment Jon Hamm made about me in an interview. I respect Jon and I am a firm believer that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and that not everyone takes the same path in life. We’re all working hard and we all have to respect one another. Calling someone who runs their own businesses, is a part of a successful TV show, produces, writes, designs, and creates, stupid, is in my opinion careless.’ I won’t dwell on the delusion, except to point out that demanding smearing edits of her estranged husband on K&KTNY is hardly producing/ writing and ripping off other people’s designs is hardly designing. Below are photos for which my agency noted she’s playing the ‘dumb blonde.’

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January Jones Wearing Too-Tight Pink Jeans

Here’s January Jones after lunch at Taste restaurant in West Hollywood (worry not, Xander ‘Lindbergh’ Jones was photographed on Thursday). I’m publishing these because I need to do something with the photos after staring at them trying to work out whether her pink almost-jeggins were giving her a camel toe. I think they’re cutting off biscuit circulation since they’re two sizes too small but so long as she’s cut out of them it’ll be fine. Also, are weird colour jeans a thing? This reminds me of Jessica Alba making yellow jeans happen. Can we not?

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Jennifer Lawrence Covers Seventeen April 2012

Jennifer Lawrence covers Seventeen April 2012 in what feels like a TOO CLOSE close up because of the awkward facial expression. She’s too pretty for this cover. What is that make-up (cherry chapstick?) and is she wearing her own clothes on the cover? Where’s the styling? Dafuq? The shoot is better and it’s below along with an interview in which she discusses her high school body image.

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I See January Jones Forgot Her Baby Again

Here’s January Jones in Los Angeles yesterday after leaving her son in the care of a responsible adult/ parked with the window cracked/ outside a firehouse/ on a leash tied to a fire hydrant or wherever she leaves him when she’s running errands because she’s too beautiful to hold her own baby. Eight photos below.

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Megan Fox’s 2.0 Face Is Making Its Comeback

Staging a comeback filled with TOO CLOSE close-ups of her Real Doll skin, here is Megan Fox at a private screening of Friends With Kids about which I don’t really care either except it’s a chance to gloat that I have pores and she doesn’t.

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Mila Kunis Covers Harper’s Bazaar April 2012

Mila Kunis covers Harper’s Bazaar April 2012 in another shoot by Uncle Terry, who’s still getting work so long as he lights his basement properly. It’s an interesting interview, rather than the usual insipid boilerplate questions. She talks about being a homebody who never goes out nor is she asked out, probably because dudes don’t want to concede to being Macaulay Culkin’s sloppy seconds.

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