Posts under ‘News’

Updating with ‘Yep, he’s alive,’ since the police don’t even care enough to do that, I thought I’d let you all know Terminator 3 actor Nick Stahl is alive. The 32-year-old was reported missing by his wife last week. Although, there was no concerted effort to find him because ‘Meh,’ that would take actual work. Instead, police conjectured that no smoking gun meant ‘F**k it, he’s probably alive in a crack house somewhere. These things have a way of working themselves out.’ Specifying that there was ‘nothing mysterious’ in a grown man going missing so they’d stick to ‘networking’ rather than investigating because there was no crime. Stahl checked into a Los Angeles rehabilitation center on Sunday, after sending an email to friends and family assuring them of his safety.

Here’s Halle Berry using her breasts for the betterment of womankind as recompense for yelling at paparazzi last week. Because her breasts approve of the publicity, they just don’t approve of people stalking her kid and by extension the other babies at her daughter’s school (which, incidentally, I could have the address of in a second because my photo agencies are sloppy and inconsistent with blurring out its name in candid photos). 10 photos included below of Berry, a bemused Mario Lopez, Matthew Morrison, and Stacy Keibler, this weekend at the 2012 Entertainment Industry Foundation Revlon Run/Walk for women in L.A..

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Dita Von Teese has a promotional interview in The Advocate in which she sounds appropriately bummed to be completely heterosexual because take it from me The Gays, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. MEH! I’m going to say little, but just offer the full quote in context because it’s spectacular. Asked by the magazine ‘Obviously you’re the desire of many straight men as well as gay and bisexual women. Do you identify as bisexual or straight or heteroflexible?’ She replied: ‘I guess now at age 39, after much experimentation over the years, I have come to realize that I am hetero, which I personally think is unfortunate, because in my dreams, my sexual attraction isn’t limited to just men! But it is what it is, isn’t it? We don’t really get to decide, do we? But I have to admit, I still fantasize about being swept away by an elegantly dressed and gorgeous butch lesbian. It’s just all that cliché faux-girl-on-girl ‘look at me, guys’ stuff I’m not into.’

I ignored this when it landed in my inbox, because the TMZ.com story was a little flat without a reaction from one of the smug porn companies who offered Octomom seven-figures last year only to gloat months later the mother was no longer worth a fraction of that. At the time, indignant, Nadya Suleman said she’d never do porn. But things have changed with her Chapter 7 bankruptcy and house foreclosure. So she’s going to be filming a fap porno this Summer. She’s literally that broke. When she posed naked in a British women’s magazine for $10,000, Suleman said it didn’t conflict with her morals because no one else was in the photos. By which logic she literally doesn’t consider this movie porn because she’s not touching anyone else. About which she told Showbiz Tonight: ‘If it’s a job, and it’s a well-paying job, and it’s gonna allow me to get out of here and move [my kids] into a very safe, huge home that they deserve I’m gonna do it.’

Still trying hard to prove that he’s had sex before, with a woman, that would have required that condom that fell out on the red carpet were he not saving it for Nicole Kidman, here’s Zac Efron unhooking a bra while inane hosts squeal with excitement. Bra masterclass starts at 1:30: ‘You just pinch, and slide.’

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