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Angelina Jolie & Johnny Depp Tourist Premiere

Dec 7th, 2010
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, and Jolie’s co-star Johnny Depp walked the red carpet for last night’s New York premiere of The Tourist. This follows weeks of interviews with Jolie and Depp; Jolie in Vogue, Depp in Vanity Fair, and the two covering Entertainment Weekly. We’ve heard more anecdotes about Jolie’s children, and the hermit lifestyles of both, to last until the next time they hit the screens. They had a decent celebrity turn out, to the red carpet of this, their big premiere in New York City. Although, other people were really just there as decoration, when Jolie and Pitt were on the same oddly pretty-looking roster as Depp; the movie’s leads, incidentally, didn’t pose together, in case you’re wondering why there are no photos of them side-by-side… that’s maybe partially that ‘avoiding rumours of a flirty affair’ thing Depp spoke of in Vanity Fair. Other celebrities in attendance included Alessandra Ambrosio, Ashanti, Paul Bettany and Jennifer Connelly, Gabourey Sidibe, Brooke Shields, and fashion designer Betsey Johnson. Jolie’s pictures are amusing. She seems to be giggling insanely in some of the pictures, as she’s pretty intently flashing her inner-thigh in that long-sleeved, cashmere, Atelier Versace dress. Remember, this is a woman who has had no plastic surgery, according to yesterday’s Daily Mail.

As a bonus, is this morning’s Today Show interview of Jolie by Matt Lauer.

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Reese Witherspoon Hearts Robert Pattinson

Dec 7th, 2010
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Trufax: 2011 will begin with Reese Witherspoon being set upon by spontaneously-urinating Twihards. Witherspoon spoke to USA Today about her upcoming film, Water For Elephants. She also lovingly whispered the sacred name of Robert Pattinson; a name only to be spoken when in the sweaty throws of group masturbation, to one’s pre-used Pattinson-shaped pillow from eBay (removing one’s Twilight-theme shower curtains and using one’s creativity to turn that into a mastrurbatory aid is also acceptable). Shortly before going missing (or not, whatever), Witherspoon said,’ ‘I’m not gonna lie. He’s a very, very handsome man.’ Adding, ‘He’s sweet and loving and has the nicest family. Kristen [Stewart] is really sweet, too. He’s a very sensitive soul. He worked really hard. He looks great in the movie, too.’ Witherspoon is shown on the set in July.

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Angelina Jolie Hasn’t Had Any Plastic Surgery

Dec 7th, 2010
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Angelina Jolie came out of her mother’s womb better looking than you are now. Take that, average-looking  readers. Hate yourselves? You should. Despite having a face that made Joan Collins drop her panties, Jolie denies that she has ever had plastic surgery. And says she probably never will. The actress gave an interview with The Daily Mail; one of her comical interviews which I assume takes place over a week, as it covers everything from that funny mole on her inner thigh to how many bowel movements she has per day (a healthy number, that’s all you need to know). In a piece entitled ‘The skeletons have already been let out of my closet: Angelina Jolie reveals the truth about Brad and her children,’ we learn about her relationship with Brad Pitt, their six children together, The Tourist and Johnny Depp. Then she lathers, rinses, and repeats, ad nauseum, until the interviewer begs for mercy and slumps over their chair with exhaustion.

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Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake’s Sex Scenes

Dec 6th, 2010
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Mila Kunis kind of sucks at sex scenes; she whined about the lesbian scenes she had to shoot with Natalie Portman for Black Swan and now she’s complaining about shooting with Justin Timberlake. And, for the record, Timberlake’s still entirely doable; so long as he’s not speaking, singing, or mangling otherwise decent films with his f**king offensive attempts at acting. Yeah, totally. Like, if he were a silent movie actor, or mute, he’d pretty much be a 10/10 (his abs make up 9.5 out of those 10, as I’ve got a weakness for great abs. And penis. But, mostly abs.) Kunis and Timberlake spend a good deal of their time together in Friends With Benefits having sex, since that’s the whole point of the film. It’s a hamfisted love story about pretty people who use each other as battery-free sex aids. Kunis found it objectionable to have to stare at Timberlake’s barely-covered junk. Just like she hated getting near Portman’s vagina. Speaking to Ellen DeGeneres, Kunis said, [Timberlake and I] got to have very uncomfortable scenes for two weeks.’ Explaining further, ‘I mean, regardless there’s like 150 crew men watching and you see each other’s bits and pieces. The whole thing is just wrong.’ Don’t look at me. I don’t get how too much exposed penis/ vagina is a bad thing. As I’ve explained in previous posts, this is what I’d call ‘Monday’.

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Ryan Gosling Melted Haagen-Dazs and Drank It

Dec 3rd, 2010
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Ryan Gosling inhabited my body and began following my daily routine, to the letter; he was living off the fattiest foods he could find, in an admirable effort to become Jabba the Hutt. The actor took part in The Hollywood Reporter’s annual actors’ roundtable, and admitted how he gained weight for a specific role. Also admitting that director Peter Jackson disapproved of his methods, Gosling notes his 60 pound weight gain was from ‘[inhabiting the body of a 20-something blogger from England, buying a pair of footie pyjamas, becoming a hermit and] melting Haagen-Dazs and drinking it.’ I may have added a word or two somewhere in his quote, for… um… readability. For The Lovely Bones, the film the director fired him from just days before production began, Gosling specifies, ‘I was melting Haagen-Dazs and drinking it when I was thirsty.’ During the discussion, video of which is shown below, Gosling admits his methods missed the mark. ‘[The director and I] had a different idea of how the character should look; I really believed he should be 210 pounds. [Jackson and I] didn’t talk very much during the pre-production process, which was the problem. It was a huge movie, and there’s so many things to deal with, and he couldn’t deal with the actors individually. I just showed up on set, and I had gotten it wrong.’ And, he was replaced with Mark Wahlberg. ‘Then,’ he adds ,’I was fat and unemployed.’

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Kirsten Dunst Discusses Shower Oral Sex Scene

Dec 2nd, 2010
by Amy Grindhouse.
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Kirsten Dunst managed not to mangle her co-star’s junk with her deranged teeth. The actress has a scene in her forthcoming movie that includes a prelude to a shower blowjob. Speaking to Vanity Fair, the January 2011 issue for which Johnny Depp covers, Dunst speaks about her role in All Good Things alongside co-star Ryan Gosling. ‘What happens is, I come into the shower with Ryan, and for my character, it’s a smart ploy,’ she told the magazine’s website. ‘What happened in the shower scene, she comes in and we start making out, and I gesture that I’m going to go down on him. And then I do.’ Asked whether it felt tacked-on, she replied, ‘It’s [my character's] gesture of coming into the shower and making him feel good, and in doing so, trying to get what she wanted. So I thought it was appropriate.’ I don’t recall hearing any stories of Gosling’s junk getting caught anywhere untoward, so either Dunst wore a mouthguard or they shot this the boring way (cutting off before the good stuff). The scene is cut from the main feature, so people will have to wait until the DVD to screencap and leak those. However, Dunst will also go nude in her next film, Melancholia. Pictures show Kirsten Dunst at the All Good Things premiere, NY on December 1.

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