Skynet Holmes wasn’t trying to harm her daughter in dragging her around the streets of New York. She was humouring a toddler who didn’t want to wear a coat; knowing that, inevitably, she’d get cold and ask for the coat back on her own. I like Holmes for giving this interview. It’s years late, but she had mothering to do and governments to hack/ overthrow. She was busy. And I’m not mad at her. Holmes covers InStyle August 2011 almost looks photoreal. It’s eerie, really.
Jessica Alba is complaining about things. I, for one, am shocked. Alba covers the August 2011 issue of Allure. It’s an odd cover in its composition; from the choice of garment to the make-up. I don’t know. Something about the cover’s just off to me. And she’s been lightly misted with glitter and lies. Alba talks to the magazine about how she’ll never again look as she did in Into the Blue. Oh, and she makes a passive-aggressive swipe at Gisele Bundchen that makes it all okay.
Because talent and faking a series of orgasms to the sound of Justin Timberlake’s intolerable voice isn’t enough to please people these days, Mila Kunis covers the August 2011 GQ in her panties. I don’t know. I like her and the fact that she had such a non-reaction to being pimped by Justin Timberlake makes me like her even more. Well, rather than give Timberlake a cover of this men’s magazine, I guess, Kunis is taking another one for the team in order to promote a movie basically released in January with another name. I’m overwhelmed by the panties and underwhelmed by GQ’s thinking on this one. They should have, at least, hedged their bets and had them both on the cover; as is the done thing now.
A preview of the Sarah Jessica Parker Vogue August 2011 cover leaked yesterday. It was a pretty underwhelming CRTL C+ CTRL V of a previous Mario Testino cover she’d done with them. Well, the cover’s been officially released and it’s above. It’s a lot better than this cover, sure. But, I don’t know. And that middle-of-the-road comedy she’s promoting hardly deserves the cover of American Vogue; maybe a lesser peer or a spread inside. Are there no more compelling people to put on the cover the month before the Kate Moss wedding issue? Well, at least I get a tickle in the schadenfreudes from this being the ‘Age Issue.’
My title is full of lies because I’m hoping that Paris Hilton sees this, is tricked into thinking her staged flop show made her relevant again, and she stops trying. She’s belatedly promoting a show people pretty much stopped talking about after its debut. I watched some, skipping the parts with even less-relevant friends who’re desperate for screen time and the obviously-staged/ scripted OTT drama; Hilton denies it’s scripted, but it’s heavily-choreographed and edited, as pointed out by Barbara Walters. Well, she’s got a photo shoot in V (‘Visionaire’ magazine or ‘Vagina’ magazine, I always forget) in which she’s topless and has bangs. Because clipping in bangs from her budget hair piece line and exposing Dirty Throw Pillows ™ is the done thing. Photos below along with her interview. I gather these two photos are her too, but she’s SO Photoshopped, who can tell?
It’s being claimed by a source that Megan Fox was in tears over the confession of Shia LaBeouf that they slept together. LaBeouf shared his penis’ travels in the same interview in which he was called a ‘f**king idiot’ by Harrison Ford. Giving away information I don’t even think the person asking thought he’d be dumb enough to admit in a million years, we learned that Fox banged LaBeouf the entire time filming of their two Transformers movies; even though she may have been with Brian Austin Green at the time. ‘Look, you’re on the set for six months, with someone who’s rooting to be attracted to you, and you’re rooting to be attracted to them,’ he told Details. ‘I never understood the separation of work and life in that situation. But the time I spent with Megan was our own thing, and I think you can see the chemistry onscreen.’ A source OK! that Fox has been distraught over the admissions, ‘Megan’s been in tears, and is apologizing to Brian… even though technically she didn’t do anything wrong since they were on a break… They are so angry at Shia.’ It’s not known whether LaBeouf apologised to Fox. She declined to comment; saying simply, ‘We have no comment.’
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