Gwen Stefani ran out of red lipstick and switched to pink for the cover of InStyle November 2011. It’s a pretty cover, she’s stunning. And she’s 42. And she has that body after two kids. I’m coming to the only logical conclusion: that pooping out an IRL baby while ingesting red lipstick is the only way to become and stay that thin. Well, you can commence hating yourself while trying to see through her translucent skin (protip: turn the screen brightness up, and tilt your screen back, then you’ll be able to see right through her). Her interview and shoot below.
Posts under ‘Magazine’
Rooney Mara Vogue Magazine November 2011
Rooney Mara promotes Girl With The Dragon Tattoo in character as Lisbeth Salander on the cover of American Vogue November 2011. I don’t hate this cover, even though I’m vaguely against the David Fincher remake with slightly-prettier people speaking English in the near scene-for-scene remake of the 2009 Swedish movie (based on the books). Incidentally, Mara also worked with Fincher ‘for four days, over 2,400 takes’ as Erica Albright, the main character Mark Zuckerberg’s girlfriend, on The Social Network. I’ve not read the GWTDT books, yet. But after the half-hearted pearl-clutching about the remake for people too lazy to read subtitles/ closed captions, I did watch the Swedish movie. I live-tweeted/FBd my reactions to it, even the scenes a weak-stomached Daniel Craig was shocked by in Esquire, saying, ‘[Fincher] showed me some scenes recently, and my hand was over my mouth, going, Are you f**king serious?’ My reaction to one of the movie’s key scenes was… ‘Girl With The S**T JUST GOT REAL Tattoo.’ And that really sums it up. The 2009 movie, anyway. The Fincher version’s unoriginal, but on the same page in its copy pasta of the original’s violence. Well, here’s Mara, cast in the role originally taken by Noomi Rapace. With the tiny, harsh bangs and the focus on pale skin and ghoulish make-up that make her looked washed-out inside the issue. Her interview, trailer, her in TSN and the 2009 trailer are below along with the rest of Mara’s Vogue photo shoot.
Kellan Lutz Is… Tense… For Men’s Fitness Cover
Kellan Lutz covers Men’s Fitness November 2011 wearing only his veins and nipples as accessories. I mean, really. Those are serial killer veins, right? And serial killer nipples. Look me in the nipples, for science, and tell me those aren’t serial killer nipples. The f**k is this cover? I can’t even take it. Kaiser at Celebitchy.com KILLED me with her intro for the same cover. That’s it, right? He’s just trying so hard to be alpha and it just comes across like the last photo taken before that very photographer’s broken body was found in a wood somewhere. Why is he so tense, why is he staring, why is he clenching his fists? His body language is awful on this cover. It’s just so alarming, roidy, and nipply.
- Adam Levine Hates Kim Kardashian Too - TooFab
- Miley Cyrus Showing Her Cleavage - The Superficial
- Tara Reid Is Basically A Paid Escort? - Hollywood PQ
- Here's Chloe Sevigny's Fake Wang - DS [NSFW]
- Jennifer Lopez's Boobs Are Sagging - Lainey Gossip
- So... How Is Sex With Miley Cyrus? - Hollywood PQ
- Courtney Stodden Is A Kitty Cat - DS [Site NSFW]
- Jeremy Renner Is Probably A Booze Hound - Rumor Fix
Kim Kardashian Is Miserable In Her Marriage?
It becomes too grating to cover every tabloid, so I’m cherry-picking one and the rest of the covers are below. This week’s Lies&Style is the only one that’s really focusing on Kim Kardashian’s wedding. Which is slightly odd, since her four-hour record-breaking (on E!) special was on this past Sunday and Monday. You’d think it’d be ripe fodder for the following tabloid Wednesday but, as with the wedding itself, most tabloids have overlooked it in favour of conjured love-triangles and filler about bikini bodies. Well, L&S is playing along with fictitious quotes on the cover and a fictitious quote from a source at the one nail salon she and her family go to. I’ve gleaned most of the scripted drama from the ludicrously named wedding special, Kim’s Fairlytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event; scripted tension, scripted fights, scripted love-ins, scripted tears. It was four-hours of shills, shopping for arbitrary wedding products, putting Lurch down whenever he had an opinion, and Kardashian’s inability to make a decision without consulting her extended family first. And so, L&S has spun that into a story about Kardashian being unhappy with her second husband. For the record, she never said ‘What have I done?’ and the ‘exclusive interview’ isn’t with the 30-year-old. L&S reports Kardashian whined, ‘I didn’t know marriage was going to be so hard. With all this travel and work, it’s been a big adjustment for both of us.’ Kardashian is ‘miserable’ and she and Lurch are reportedly ‘always fighting.’
Sara Leal Pulls Sad Face For Us Weekly Cover
Sara Leal is pulling her best sad face on the cover of Us Weekly. Leal doesn’t make herself sound good in this lawyer-approved interview, one of several she sold today. Basically, the 22-year-old San Diego-based administrative assistant admits the naked hot tub time with married Ashton Kutcher and her friend. She got naked because he asked nicely, basically. I’m actually not kidding. I think it’s normal for Leal, a girl who’s on the Internet exposing her chest for giggles, when she says ‘I didn’t think [getting naked with a stranger] was out of the ordinary.’
Salma Hayek Latina Magazine November 2011
Salma Hayek covers Latina November after being Photoshopped and whittled down with the brush of some hack digital artist. They did a lot of work on her face, right? Colour-correcting and smoothing. And I think they slimmed her arms and her waist too. EGADS, her waist. I was so distracted inspecting her boob size, for science, I nearly missed her waist/ hips. She’s hourglass-shaped, but not to that extent. The digital artist stole her rib cage! Well, the interview itself is about artificial beauty. How fitting. The 45-year-old was asked whether she’d anger GOOP by going for a vanity procedure. Hayek’s sticking to creams for now.






