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Posts under ‘Celebrity Dating’

Kimye’s Sex Swing Will Gather Dust This Season

Not even at the behest of pimp momager will the bottom b**ch disrobe and take a bubble bath on camera as one half of Kimye. THE POWER OF MONIES COMPELS YOU! Confirming what RadarOnline.com and others have been saying for over a month, Kim Kardashian told E! News about Kanye West’s screen time with a season premiere I think is this weekend: ‘I want to show my life. If we’re having dinner and he does show up, I’m sure we’re not going to go, ‘Stop the cameras!’ [But] I’m not going to be taking a bubble bath and drinking champagne or on a sex swing [on camera] like Khloé and Lamar do. It’s not going to be like that.’

Five photos of Kim Kardashian arriving at LAX in Los Angeles, CA April 15.

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The Choreographer Knows We’re Watching

Casper Smart has been promoted from The Help to Choreographer of All The Things. At least, that’s what Jennifer Lopez told him, to keep him quiet, and happy, before the Enrique Iglesias joint tour. And because Lopez takes The Choreographer everywhere, she brought him to the Hollywood What To Expect When You’re Expecting premiere. During which he was interviewed too, because he’s a ‘get’ now; people are obliged to ask him questions, while gritting their teeth, and wishing the real Choreographer of All The Things would take the red carpet instead. Asked by Access Hollywood how long it took his girlfriend to dress from the bottom the hamper, the 25-year-old replied: ‘How long does it take any girl to get ready?!? She doesn’t take that long.’ Asked how his fashion has changed since he became a ‘get,’ he replied: ‘She has great fashion. It definitely makes me pull up. I have to go a little bit harder, watch what I wear. I can’t walk around in sweats and just chill out clothes. I’ve got to [look] nice.’

Pimp Momager Pushing For Kimye’s Wedding

This makes a little more sense, in the context of the random stories the past week about Kim Kardashian and Kanye West being ‘very serious… in love… talking marriage… and looking at rings’ according to various sources. Which I wrote off as promotion for them faking it on Keeping Up With The Kardashians. As mentioned before, Kris Jenner is ‘thrilled’ about the money she could make from her daughter sleeping with a guy for publicity. She’s so ‘thrilled’ her bottom b**ch is going above and beyond, there’s a push to trap West into marriage so there can be another televised and monetised wedding. A source tells Radar that Kimye’s Fairy Tale Wedding: A Pimp Momager Event will be Jenner’s fault: ‘Kris Jenner is ecstatic that Kim is dating Kanye. She can see their celebrity stock and wealth rising by the day. She is pushing hard for Kim to get her claws into Kanye and would love it if he proposed. She has already told Kim that if they make it down the aisle they are going to do it on camera again. There’s just too much money to be made for Kris to allow this to be done privately. You would think most moms would be keen for their daughter to take it slow, especially seeing as Kim’s divorce still isn’t finalized from the last fiasco. But, Kris just marks Kris Humphries down as a major mistake to be forgotten and is eager for Kim to move on to bigger and better things, which, she believes, Kanye definitely is.’

Promoted From The Help To The Choreographer

Today in things that portend Jennifer Lopez marrying this one too, she’s promoted the help from babysitter to choreographer. It’s his first meaningful promotion since directing her in that music video so he’s getting a little overexcited. It’s reported today in Page Six that Lopez hired Casper Smart to choreograph her joint tour with Enrique Iglesias. Smart’s one of four choreographers, because Iglesias isn’t the one d**kmatized. However, according to P6, Smart was seen outside the Atlantico Rum bar telling reporters he was the ‘lead choreographer…in charge of all choreography.’ But he’s really in charge of choreographing only 1/4 of The Slumming World Tour because her rep claims there are four choreographers including Smart. Photos from Idol set yesterday.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt Terrified Adam Levine

Jennifer Love Hewitt officially failed at seducing Adam Levine over the tubes. Although, Levine is yesterday’s news because Hewitt is already boning The Client List co-star Colin Egglesfield. Asked about that time Hewitt flirted on TV, saying she ‘had her eyes out’ for newly-single Levine, the rocker replied: ‘I heard about that. That was aggressive. It was really sweet and flattering. Beautiful life, you know, when a beautiful woman says nice things about you.’

Kris Humphries Just Realised That Kimye Is Fake

Kris Humphries only just realised that his estranged wife is faking a relationship with Whichever Rich Black Guy Is Around At The Time because MONIES. So she doesn’t have to go back to making porn. RadarOnline.com reports that Humphries wants to know whether Kimye is contrived for ratings because it goes toward the credibility of his fraud case: ‘The crux of Kris’ case for annulment is that Kim married him under fraudulent pretenses and did it for her reality show. Team Humphries wants to know if producers of the Kardashian reality shows were in contact with Kanye West prior to the new couple dating or going public with their relationship and what those conversations consisted of. When did Kim develop romantic feelings for Kanye and why after publicly stating she wouldn’t feature any future romantic relationships on her reality shows, did she do a complete 360?’ 10 photos of Kardashian leaving her Manhattan hotel April 25.

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