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Posts under ‘Brangelina’

Brad Pitt’s Pimp Cane Tour Of America 2012

Still needs a cup. Here’s Brad Pitt at the New York Film Critics Circle Awards January 9, following the weekend’s appearance at the Palm Springs International Film Festival. Pitt’s story changed about how he got hurt. Well, not so much the how as where. Entertainment Online claimed previously he: ‘wiped out on a ski slope while carrying one of his twins. He twisted his knee and suffered some ACL damage in the process.’ However, Pitt told Us Weekly he was at home when it happened: ‘I was carrying my daughter [Vivienne Jolie-Pitt, 3] down the hill and I slipped and it was either her or me,’ Pitt said. ‘It’s my ACL [for which I won't have surgery] I think I will be alright!’ Angelina Jolie added, ‘Vivi’s okay. She was absolutely fine. He took the fall.’ Jolie also told Fox News something slightly different: ‘We are building different parts of the lawn, and he was going down to see it, and the grass was changing levels, and he slipped. In order to make sure [Vivienne] was okay he threw himself down to protect her. He did the dad thing.’

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Angelina Jolie & An Injured Brad Pitt At PSIFF

Angelina Jolie and an injured Brad Pitt were two of the celebrities at the Palm Springs International Film Festival 2012. Pitt has been walking around with a pimp cane since last week, prompting conspiracy theories about the root of his injury. It’s not that exciting, Pitt says it’s not a broken hip, or whatever, he fell while skiing. Entertainment Tonight claims he ‘wiped out on a ski slope while carrying one of his twins. He twisted his knee and suffered some ACL damage in the process.’ Um, skiing while carrying a squirming toddler, that’ll do it. Well, here’s Pitt, hips intact, and Jolie who I don’t think is preggo despite rumours to the contrary. 10 photos include Charlize Theron, George Clooney, Stacy Keibler.

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Jennifer Aniston Probably Has Brad Pitt’s Sperm

Jennifer Aniston just ticked off the last crazy box in Cat Lady Bingo. I assumed she handed in her giant marker and tombola when she started dating Justin Theroux. However, this anecdote from a friend certifies her as a lifetime member of the club (lifetime membership also means her cats will always have a father in Theroux). Journalist friend Maureen Dowd wrote in The New York Times Magazine that late mutual-friend Sue Mengers knew what was up. Dowd recalls: ‘After Brad Pitt left Jennifer Aniston for Angelina Jolie, Mengers told me that she advised her beloved Jen to ask Brad for some of his sperm.’ She totally did it.

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Angelina Jolie Threatening To Get Pregnant

The threat level has already been set to maximum, the proper authorities alerted, and emergency aid sent to Angelina Jolie’s existing chirrens. Jolie has threatened to Michelle Duggar the living s**t out of her womb, if $500,000 in damp strang singles aren’t delivered in the bottom of a muffin basket to my house. Um, I think that’s what she’s threatening anyway. Some more quotes have been released from Jolie’s Marie Claire interview, in which the mother undoes all the hard work of the Vanity Fair denial. Telling Marie Claire: ‘Nothing planned at the moment, but we just don’t know. I could end up pregnant.’ Oh, or it could just be a publicity-grab empty threat since she’s got a movie out.

Brad Pitt As Eraserhead For NY Times Magazine

Brad Pitt covers New York Times Magazine in what’s got to be the best magazine cover ever. For those who’ve been following, this is Pitt after being drained of his glorious Technicolor by Chupacabra Jolie. Don’t worry, they digitally added back the colour, so it looks great. Pitt is channeling Eraserhead from David Lynch’s 1977 movie. There’s video below of Pitt smizing through this aneurysm.

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Angelina Jolie Covers Marie Claire January 2012

Angelina Jolie covers Marie Claire January 2012 after fully-digesting Brad Pitt’s formerly-glorious Technicolor (it’s got what a Chupacabra needs). Jolie is promoting her new film, In The Land Of Blood & Honey, which may be a copy pasta of someone else’s work. That remains to be seen. So, until that’s settled, let’s all look at pretty pictures. Here’s Marie Claire trying to start something with its cover: On directing, marriage, and why ‘I could get pregnant again.’

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