Britney Sawed In Half For ‘Circus’ Tour

All I could think when reading the excitable news bulletins of Britney Spears’ upcoming tour stating that the singer was going to be sawed in half on stage was… if you picked her up and then shook her would lots of Cheetos fall out?

I mean, if you sawed me in half and then picked up the half that held my tummy, loads of meds and Jelly Babies would fall out. Either that or the whole pizza I just ate in one go without even cutting the damn thing into slices first (cutting up food before eating it is for pussies!!!)

Back to BritBrit and her amazingly uninspiring and unoriginal tour ‘bit’. Well, it seems the tour is suffering already from the loss of the mega talented Wade Robson who was drafted in early on to make the tour, well, not SUCK!

“Right away, she got into the boxes and into the magic contraptions to learn the stuff, and she’s so excited about this tour and all the elements that are in it,” illusionist-comedian Ed Alonzo, “the Misfit of Magic” (and former Saved by the Bell diner owner) who will be doing a number with Spears on her Circus tour, tells E! News. The pop star will serve as Alonzo’s assistant in the bit.

“We’re going to be doing the classics of magic but a little high-tech,” he said. “We’ll be doing a little dissection, transposition, a vanish, an appearance—and if I do a trick she doesn’t just hold the props, she’s actually getting inside the big boxes or I am slicing her up.”

Sounds a bit risky, which is perhaps why Team Spears decided to leave the tricks to a professional.

I “made [the tricks] really easy for her…but there are some complicated things that she is doing that you would think a contortionist would have to do, or a trained magicians assistant,” Alonzo said. “But because…she’s a dancer, it really makes sense to put her in the magic, and it works and she’s really really good at it.”

“Some of it’s pretty scary but she gets right in there with no reservations,” he added.

Image credit to Clint Brewer / Splash News.